I hate admitting

I feel like I'm falling in to depression again, I have tried my hardest to talk to people and try not to fall but i am, I think I'm on the edge right now. I have days where nothing really bothers me but lately i have been really hating the time when my mom goes to work. I know i only have about 5 weeks before i go back to work but in that time i am going to feel so much worse. The day is fine, my mom is here and i can go and do things but it gets to like 4pm and time seems to stop, my dad comes home and I have to take Charlotte up stairs and spend the rest of my night up there. I have to pass my test this year, ideally asap. There is only so many places i can go when i don't drive. I think when i go back to work it wont be as bad because Charlotte will be off with Liz until Adam picks her up or i have to get her and i will have my work to keep my occupied.

Some pictures that make me so happy while I'm feeling so down.

I think I'm going to have to do another Photo shoot very soon, I had some pictures done recently but she really wasn't in the mood so there was only a few half decent ones.

Charlotte has been on her medication for her birthmarks for over a month now and i am starting to see the difference, not so much on her bottom and her back but the one on her ear is definitely getting smaller and the one on her face doesn't grow as much as it used to when she gets upset. She has an appointment with an eye specialist this week just to check the one on her face hasn't done any damage to her eye on the inside but we don't think it has.

I want Charlotte's 'firsts' to be remembered so much that I'm getting her a Charlotte's 1st Easter jumper.

I have been trying to plan Charlotte's christening since November and I'm getting nowhere. i have to go to church on Wednesday to see if the Rev is in to see if she will agree to let us have the christening at that church and then see if they rent out the hall on the side. I have so many ideas for decorations and cakes.

Final picture The cutest outfit i have seen and i must have it.

Until next time x